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The Relationship Boundary: Why You Keep Failing and How to Have a Healthy Boundary

Boundaries are an important part of any healthy relationship. Whether it's between two people, a group, or even with yourself, setting boundaries can help ensure that everyone's needs and expectations are respected. Unfortunately, many people struggle to establish and maintain boundaries in their relationships, leading to tension and conflict.

In this blog post, we'll discuss why you might be failing at setting boundaries and how to have a healthy boundary in your relationships.

Understanding Boundaries

Having clear boundaries is essential for any relationship. A boundary is a limit or space between you and another person that marks where you end and the other person begins. They are mental and emotional guidelines that help us define our relationships and protect our mental health.

Boundaries are also important for our self-care, allowing us to respect ourselves and be respected by others.

Boundaries help us understand where we stand in relation to other people and how we will handle different situations. This can include anything from setting limits on what kind of physical contact we are comfortable with to letting others know when we need some space. By setting boundaries, we are able to communicate our needs, values, and expectations in a respectful way.

Why You Keep Failing

When it comes to setting boundaries, many of us keep failing due to lack of mental health awareness. It's not that we don't want to set healthy boundaries, it's that we don't understand the importance of our mental health and how it plays into the dynamics of a relationship. It's easy to fall into patterns of over-giving or over-expecting, but having awareness of our own mental health can help us better understand why these patterns might be forming.

Why people fail at setting boundaries, the answer is complex. It could be the result of anxiety, depression, past trauma, or other mental health issues. Some individuals struggle with feeling like they don’t deserve boundaries, or that their opinion doesn’t matter.

Others might feel like they need to please others in order to be accepted, which can lead them to agree to things they don’t want to do. Low self-esteem can also cause people to put others’ needs before their own, leaving them unable to set healthy boundaries. Mental health is an important factor when it comes to understanding why someone may have difficulty in creating and sticking with healthy relationship boundaries.

Setting a Healthy Boundary in Relationship

Creating and maintaining healthy boundaries in relationships is an essential part of any healthy relationship. Boundaries provide a sense of security and respect for each partner. They allow us to take care of ourselves and respect the other person's feelings, rights, and beliefs.

Here are some tips for setting healthy boundaries in relationships:

1. Communicate openly and honestly with your partner. Be willing to share your thoughts and feelings honestly and openly. This will help you to build trust and make sure your needs are being met.

2. Set limits. Decide what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior in your relationship. Make sure your expectations are clear and reasonable.

3. Respect the other person’s space. Allow your partner to have their own space and respect their need for privacy.

4. Take responsibility for your own mental health. Take time for yourself and look after your own.

Know When To Get Help

If you and your partner are struggling with setting healthy boundaries in the relationship or in other areas in your life, don't hesitate to reach out for support.

Here at Blue Oak Counseling we’re more than happy to help you and create change in your life. Contact us today (909) 366-4712 or Schedule a free consultation

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